Kintsugi Read online

  The Art of Kintsugi

  The repair is not only visible but emphasized by highlighting it with gold. The object’s past is taken into consideration, thus transforming it into a unique, precious, and irreplaceable object.

  What About You?

  Are you ready to try a new personal-development technique and ask for some support in your healing process? Could you let your enthusiasm carry you forward?

  It’s Time to Act!

  The Different Personal-Development Techniques

  Relax, rid yourself of all thoughts, and read the list below. Listen to your intuition to discover whether any of the techniques that follow immediately speak to you. This list is simply a starting point for inspiration, without any preferences. Certainly, some of these overlap, when the body is caring for the mind and vice versa. These groups are only my suggestions, and it’s not possible to give you all the details here. Glean from the list below and use what inspires you.

  Physical paths: yoga, running, obstacle course racing, climbing, Pilates, martial arts, boxing, healthy nutrition, vegetarianism, fasting, osteopathy, fasciatherapy, acupuncture, reflexology, naturopathy, Chinese medicine, balneotherapy, chi nei tsang, shiatsu, hydrotherapy, chiropractics, etc.

  Emotional paths: psychotherapy, psychoanalysis, spiral dynamics, laughter yoga, hypnosis, mindfulness meditation, improv, MBSR, eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR), EFT, clown workshop, nonviolent communication, rebirth, Gestalt therapy, positive psychology, primal therapy, logotherapy, Alexander, etc.

  Sensitivity paths: Bach flowers, kinesiology, hippotherapy, massages, aromatherapy, dancing, music therapy, overtone singing, Tibetan bowls, chromotherapy, Feldenkrais method, tantrism, etc.

  Energy paths: energy harmonization care, feng shui, geobiology, chi gong, tai chi, Reiki, shamanism, magnetism, lithotherapy, etc.

  Systemic or family paths: psychogenealogy, family constellations, inner child, etc.

  Artistic paths: mandala, clay block therapy, writing, calligraphy, theater, art therapy, painting, drawing, sculpture, pottery, kintsugi, etc.

  Go Further . . .

  Buy a book about your chosen subject, or learn more about your favorite method by checking out the Internet, videoconferences, and interviews.

  Start Here and Now!

  Write down all the techniques that appeal to you, even if you don’t know why...

  Imagine

  No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it.

  —Albert Einstein

  Be creative and dare to think differently!

  When we break an object, our first reaction might be to throw it away, or to repair it superficially, so that the break isn’t visible.

  The art of kintsugi, however, proposes to approach the problem from the opposite intent. Instead of hiding the fissures, kintsugi suggests to emphasize them and even embellish them. Instead of losing its value, the object becomes even more precious than before it was broken. This is the message in Edgar Allan Poe’s famous short story The Purloined Letter, where a stolen letter is displayed instead of being hidden. Creative thinking is often described as thinking outside of the box. The French equivalent translates literally into “leaving the trodden path.” Look for solutions outside your normal routines. Albert Einstein was fond of remarking that the definition of madness is expecting different results when doing the same thing over and over again. It would therefore appear reasonable to look for solutions by going in a different direction and thinking differently.

  At the beginning of my career, I often changed my job but never felt fulfilled, to the point where every morning I felt sick about having to go back to work. Finally, one day I realized that all my problems came from not being well suited to work in a corporate environment. If I wanted to stop being unhappy at work, I needed to look at things differently. I realized that in my heart I had always truly wanted to be

  self-employed and create my own business. Three days after this epiphany, I began the adventure of starting my own wedding planning business. That was 2003 when this kind of business did not yet exist in France! I had to change my routine and try something different. I had to think outside the box.

  If you always do the same thing, you risk limiting yourself to the same results forever. In order to break the cycle of the same methods, it’s necessary to envision things from a different perspective. To change your life, something in your life has to change . . .

  The Spirit of Kintsugi

  The spirit of kintsugi can even translate to interior design. Each fissure, each crack can become beautiful and provide an opportunity to breathe new life into an object or a building. An excellent example of this is the Parisian restaurant Anahi. In order to preserve the original hundred-year-old integrity of this location, the owners carefully repaired it by filling and highlighting the old cracks with copper leaf.

  What About You?

  Do you have a tendency to use the same methods over and over and then complain about the same unsatisfactory results? What would happen if you started thinking differently and changed just one aspect of your life?

  It’s Time to Act!

  The Power of Brainstorming

  During one of my previous lives, while working in the marketing department for a flavor and fragrance company, I was in charge of facilitating brainstorming sessions. During these meetings we produced many ideas, but they were not necessarily always related to each other. None of these ideas were given any priority, at least at the beginning of the process. It was only during a second session that we began to attach value to them. Try using one of these techniques to inspire your own creativity. The SCAMPER technique, whose name is derived from the first letters of the suggested actions, is an invitation to see things differently.

  In thinking about what gets in your way, try to . . .

  S : Substitute

  C : Combine

  A : Adapt

  M : Modify

  P : Put to another use

  E : Eliminate

  R : Reverse

  Go Further . . .

  Another efficient creativity technique is mind mapping, also called mental mapping or heuristic scheme. It uses a diagram to help classify and clarify your ideas, thus leading to the creation of new ones. Write down a problem or a topic in the center of a page. Draw a circle around it. All other ideas emerge from this central statement. From there you create idea branches related to the central statement, intuitively classifying your thoughts. This very visual technique can incorporate significant symbols for you, like different colors for different categories. You can thus immediately see what is missing, associate different ideas, complement them, and refine them by adding supplementary branches, etc.

  I have used the heuristic technique all my life to organize my ideas. It was useful to prepare essay plans, to find new ideas when I worked in marketing, to prepare proposals for my wedding planning, and also to find new book ideas. I have been using it for each question in my life whenever I’ve had to make a decision. I have a whole notebook covering the last twenty years, and it gives me great pleasure to immerse myself in it from time to time.

  If this method inspires you, I invite you to use this tool to help you find and classify your ideas, to internalize them, and most importantly, to clarify them!

  Start Here and Now!

  Take a piece of paper and write down your most important problem in the center. Draw a circle around it. This is the beginning of your brainstorming session and the center of your first mental map.

  Visualize

  Vision is the art of seeing things invisible.

  —Jonathan Swift

  Concentrate and imagine the repaired object in all its splendor.

  Before starting to work on the broken object, the kintsugi master first imagines what it will look like when
it’s splendidly restored. This is a good metaphor for your own life. It is, after all, well known that the brain can program itself to act in both a positive or negative mode. What are the repetitive actions of your own programming? What kind of thoughts are you feeding your brain with? Do you have a long-term vision? And could you reprogram yourself?

  I had already recognized the power of visualization as a teenager. I went through perplexing and complex times. I went from a smiling, sweet, four-year-old girl with a sunny disposition to an ugly duckling when my parents divorced. I isolated myself from the rest of the world and became an abnormally shy, troubled introvert. I have to admit that my thick glasses, braces, and chubby little stomach didn’t help either. I preferred to stay hidden, out of the spotlight.

  However, when I was fifteen I read about the power of visualization in a teen magazine. I suddenly realized that I could, and I wanted to change things. I visualized a better version of myself each and every day.

  I covered all the walls in my room with stimulating and inspiring images, like a huge visualization board. In addition, theater tryouts helped to improve my self-esteem.

  Visualization nourished me and allowed me to hatch and to come out of my shell. Today I accept my strengths, my weaknesses, and my eccentricities, and I have no problem speaking in public. I accept who I am.

  So you too can project your future successes and accomplishments onto an internal imaginary screen. Visualize a better version of yourself!

  The Power of Visualization

  Many scientific studies have attested to the power of visualization.

  One can use it to treat unreasonable fear, to anticipate stressful situations, to prepare oneself for a medical procedure, to improve one’s memory, or to aid the healing process . . .

  For example, visualization is a well-known sports training technique. Athletes can significantly improve their performance by visualizing well-executed movements and success before a sports event.

  There are two basic kinds of visualization. Realistic visualization is based on real situations, such as using all five senses to visualize speaking in public for instance. Symbolic visualization uses metaphors, such as imagining a problem in the shape of a black cloud, protecting oneself with a bubble of light. It’s up to you to find the best technique that suits you.

  For all situations it is thus possible to imagine a visualization of success. It seems that the brain uses the same circuits for real and imaginary situations and, therefore, does not differentiate between the two. So you might as well nourish your brain with beautiful thoughts.

  What About You?

  What is particularly important to you? What if you start today by visualizing your successes and your wounds already healed?

  It’s Time to Act!

  The Vision Board

  A vision board can be a powerful tool to address your subconscious at the time when you create it and on a daily basis after. It is a method that works by positioning images that inspire and stimulate you side by side.

  Define the format from the beginning. It is best to choose a large format (for example, twenty by thirty inches). You can attach the elements to a piece of cardboard, a frame, a large sheet of paper, or even on a magnetic board, to update regularly.

  Gather a variety of magazines. Ideally, these should contain many general images with subjects that attract you spontaneously. (This is also the time to ask yourself what captivates your attention the most.)

  Instinctively and without overthinking, scan each magazine and cut out the pages that interest you. Proceed in the spirit of brainstorming without any restrictions or hesitation.

  Cut out the separate images and place them side by side on your board. Search, reattach, replace, and rearrange until you like the result.

  Sit back and look at your creation. Certain choices will surprise you. This is your subconscious speaking to you through these images.

  Your board can be kept secret or shared with some close friends so they can help you interpret your creation.

  Look at your creation every day and concentrate: What you see there represents a condensed version of your aspirations. Little by little, the images will become a part of you, to inspire your new adventure.

  Go Further . . .

  Mental movies is another efficient visualization technique. Project positive images by visualizing successful situations onto your internal, imaginary screen. If you do this regularly, your brain will progressively register the new information.

  Start Here and Now!

  Pick up the first magazine that’s close by and cut out the first image!

  Stage 2

  Assemble

  urayama shi / omoi kire tok / neko no koi

  The moon in the water;

  broken and broken again,

  still it is there.

  —Ueda Cho̅shu̅

  (1852–1932)

  Prepare

  In the fields of observation chance favors only the prepared mind.

  —Louis Pasteur

  Clean the pieces of the object, gather all the tools (palette knife, palette, lacquer, paintbrush, gold powder, drying box, wooden sticks, turpentine, sandpaper, silk cotton balls), and protect yourself by wearing gloves.

  While preparing for his work, the kintsugi master is not in a hurry. First, he steps back, evaluates, prepares, and carefully arranges his materials. He takes his time with slow, precise, and measured gestures. He knows that once the procedure starts, time is of the essence and he cannot afford to make any mistakes. This is why it’s essential that everything is organized and accessible before the actual work begins, like a surgical operation. This step may appear to be unnecessary, but this ritual of preparation is already part of the healing process.

  Just as the materials for kintsugi are carefully assembled, you can prepare yourself with care before starting your own healing process. Take a step back, slow down, and get ready for the sacred event of your own transformation.

  This method was new to me at first. All my life I had the tendency to rush ahead at one hundred miles per hour. My motto? Fast and efficient. I was focused on managing my business, blind to our problems as a couple, and always in a hurry and under stress. I didn’t realize I was heading straight into a wall. At times, life has its own sense of humor:

  Instead of letting me move straight ahead with force, it derailed me straight into a ditch, literally. On a day like any other, while racing to go home, I missed a curve in the road, resulting in a serious automobile accident. The car was reduced to twisted metal. By some miracle, I only suffered a very small wound above my left eye. My first gash, whose scar I cherish still today. It was like a wake-up call, trying to alert me. But I didn’t get the message, and I continued faster and faster straight for the wall that was looming ahead. Until one day my life blew up, when I got divorced. And then, one year after, when my mother committed suicide. This time I had no choice but to stop.

  These life-changing events took me a long time to address. However, now I realize that they led me to the path of mindfulness. At first I suffered enormously, totally removed from my comfort zone. I sat immobilized on my meditation pillow, suffering through the thousands of pains in my neck and what felt like ants devouring my feet, but most of all the overwhelming impatience!

  Today I greatly enjoy the ritual of meditation. But it is mostly during my day-to-day activities that I am really conscious of my progress. My movements have slowed down, and I approach with deliberation and pleasure even the most ordinary tasks, savoring each instant.

  Life is quirky; ironically, circumstances forced me to drive again. For me, a two-hour daily commute is anything but fun. Lately, rather than complaining about the traffic jams, I have learned to appreciate the “here and now.” I see these intervals that would have been insignificant or even disagreeable in the past in a positive new light and t
he beginning of being fully conscious. I still have a long way to go, but I understand that I have all the time to get there.

  “When you eat, eat; when you walk, walk.” I love this Zen concept. I have made it my new mantra. How many times have you eaten a piece of cake without really tasting it? The piece might already be gone before you even noticed it was there! Or drank a quick cup of coffee? The cup might already be empty before you tasted anything . . . “Here and now” is really the only moment that counts, because the past doesn’t exist anymore and the future isn’t here yet. Life is nothing but a sequence of small, fleeting moments. If you are consciously aware of this fact, you too will be able to take a measured step back with pleasure instead of rushing ahead. With your head held high, feel and enjoy each moment as if it were the most important of your life: It actually is! Here and now, enjoy the presents of the present.

  The Zen Monk and the Umbrella

  Legend has it that one day a Zen monk went to see his master. After many years of practice, he felt ready to become a master himself.

  It was a rainy day, and as traditional custom, he left his shoes and his umbrella at the door.

  Once standing before his master, he offered his respects and said, “Master, I have been following your teachings for years. Am I ready?”

  The master looked at him with gentleness and said to him, “To begin with, please tell me one thing. When you arrived, you took off your shoes and left your umbrella. Did you put your umbrella on the right side or left side of your shoes?”

  The disciple was surprised. He had not anticipated such a question, and answered, “I haven’t the slightest idea!”